Situational Confidence – The Key to Success

How To Create Situational Confidence

Are you an expert in your job but start to sweat if you have to talk about it in front of people?

What about life and soul of the party but become a shrinking violet if you have to speak to somebody new? 😲

You can fix it

You must fix it!

situational confidence

How much money is it costing you when you don’t have the confidence to take that promotion or speak to those clients like you’re the one in control?

How many potential love interests have you let get away because you were too scared to approach them?

Regret is a yucky feeling, my friend

What’s good about situational confidence is that all confidence is situational

We see someone who is confident in meeting people and we imagine that he or she is a powerhouse of self-assuredness in every aspect of life

That’s simply not always the case

They might be absolutely awful in some other areas

Their confidence might even be a sham

There is an attribute that can carry you through all situations, but that’s another story. Happy to talk with you about it.

Do you have an area where you fear to show up?

Drop “SITCH” in the comments and I’ll send my simple and foolproof strategy to overcome any obstacle

Self-Esteem and Attraction

Self-Esteem and Attraction

“𝙔𝙤𝙪’𝙧𝙚 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙪𝙜𝙡𝙮, 𝙮𝙤𝙪’𝙧𝙚 𝙟𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙡𝙤𝙤𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙖𝙩𝙩𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣!”

Have you ever thought this about someone?

Someone who is perfectly attractive and yet insists they have issues with their appearance

I have

Until I realised how self-esteem worked

Because if someone thinks they look bad

No matter how much you tell them they look good

They will think they look bad

You’ve probably been there too

✅You’re having a bad hair day

✅You look fatter today for some reason

✅Your clothes don’t fit right

✅You’ve got a zit even though you’re 37

and your significant other says

“You look fine” 🤮

And you know they’re just saying that

Because in fact you look like shit

I used to feel like that a lot but I had an excellent coping mechanism

Booze

Who doesn’t feel more attractive after a few drinks?

Obviously that’s not a permanent solution

So a couple of years ago I happened upon (worked my ass off to achieve) the perfect solution

🔥I did something about it

🔥I changed myself

🔥I assumed control of my body, my mind and future

Self-Esteem out the wazoo

I don’t care now if I’m having a bad hair day

Or if I’ve got a zit and I’m 43

If I’m fat and my clothes don’t fit, well that’s a matter of poor planning on my side so I became more organised

And anyone who’s willing to put the work in

No matter how good looking

Or otherwise

They think they are

Can do the same 😀

PM me or drop “NICE” in the comments and I’ll start you off with 3 tools to significantly increase your attractiveness levels with the minor long-term side effect of increasing your self-esteem

Stress Management with Self-Mastery

Stress Management with Self-Mastery

I have a very different approach to stress management than most people I talk to. I want to note first of all that I’m no doctor and this is what’s helped me and may well help you but for any health issues, a doctor is always a great option.

When I first started becoming successful in the Leadership sphere I began to extend my working hours. I worked longer hours and was always on call, constantly checking my emails and spent much of my time socializing with people from work. I worked away from home a lot and frequently added more and more to my plate in order to prove myself.

All a complete waste of time. Companies are rarely grateful for that level of effort and they certainly didn’t pay me double for working 90 hours a week.

I started having trouble sleeping and my mother noticed that my face was red all the time. My doctor asked me if I was suffering from stress and I scoffed at the thought. I was young, successful and kicking ass, how could I be stressed?

But I was and I just didn’t know it. And I knew nothing of stress management.

Of course it caught up with me in the end and I had to step back from working myself into the ground.

It hurt and I vowed to never let myself get into that position again.

Now, I avoid stress like the plague. Because it is like a plague. It’s dangerous. Lethal even.

Stress Management

Here are 3 incredibly powerful techniques I use in managing stress levels.

Narrowing Thoughts

This is quite controversial as people in my immediate vicinity don’t like it

I try to keep the things I think about to a minimum. This consists of things like:

✅Mindfulness
✅Writing Things Down
✅Utilizing a Calendar
✅Removing the Minutiae

While I forget more things now than I used to I’m fine with it.

Not Taking Things Personally

One thing that really used to annoy me is if someone didn’t have the same opinion as me.

How stupid does that sound when you read it?

In fact a lot of people are like that. If they see something they don’t agree with they try to change other people’s opinions, get into arguments or even impact their relationships in their desperation to be correct.

Now I just don’t care, because anyone can have any opinion. It doesn’t make me wrong or make my opinion less valuable to me.

Where this also helps is when I get “haters”. For example when someone

😡Doesn’t like the way I drive
😡Doesn’t like something I write on my site or social media
😡Doesn’t agree with my thoughts on Self-Mastery or Life Coaching

and sends me an angry or abusive or sarcastic comment or message

I let it wash over me like water off a duck’s back.

I don’t take it personally.

Angry people are angry with themselves, not me. Negative people don’t need me making their life worse by getting adding even more negativity.

I don’t need their negativity either and I refuse to take it on board.

stress management

Say NO

I just say NO

People are astonished at this one

Generally my rule of thumb is:

If it’s not advancing my goals, I don’t do it

This is extremely liberating. I don’t let myself feel shamed into doing anything I don’t really want to.

🥂Say NO to time wasting activity
🥂Say NO to other people’s dramas
🥂Say NO to almost everything

Saying “no” to others is saying “yes” to yourself.

There you have it, you have to be brave to assume control of your life and the harsh reality is that you may lose friends when you do.

But you’ll be taking control of your life and managing your stress for those who most need you.

Totally worth it

Click here to tweet so that other people can start to manage their stress.

If you want to discuss this further or work with me on managing your stress levels, get in touch or reach out on social media.

R

Control

Control

The more action you take to control that which you can control creates a place where the things you can’t control fall in your favour.

The problem that exists is that we think we can control things we have no agency over and we don’t know the extent of the things we can control.

Here’s one to be going on with:

You CAN’T control other people, how they react or what they think

You CAN control yourself, how you react and the things you think, feel and believe.

Life Coach in Newcastle Upon Tyne

life coach in newcastle

I became a Life Coach in Newcastle to help people, which is no rare thing for someone in this profession, but it started off with a very specific group of people.

For 15 years I’ve lived in Newcastle Upon Tyne and have grown to look upon this city as my home. You only need to speak with me to know I’m not a local, but my fondness for the people of Northeast England shouldn’t be underestimated. My children will grow up as Geordies and their mother is about as dyed-in-the-wool a Novocastrian as you can get.

There is one thing I would change in an instant.

The fixed mindset.

There are many factors that contribute to the preponderance of the fixed mindset in this part of the world and I’m not going to delve into them. My knowledge of the socio-political landscape is surface-level at best and I’m sure some brainbox would jump on the opportunity to shove my ignorance in my face.

Local Life Coaching

It’s enough to say that, globally, self-belief is a rare commodity and equally so in this wonderful corner of the world.

Many people just don’t see their potential.

They doubt the possibility of social mobility

They don’t believe in themselves

But I do believe in them and I want to help as many people as I can to break through their social conditioning, smash through the fixed mindset and assume control of their lives.

It’s also fair to say that as a Life Coach in Newcastle it’s easier for me to work with local folk, simply because it’s more enjoyable and efficient to work with people face-to-face.

You build stronger bonds, quicker and get results faster.

While I’m not the cheapest (and why would anyone want the cheapest) Life Coach in Newcastle, I do consider myself amongst the very best in the UK and I’d like to dispel any misgivings by offering a 30% discount on any 1-2-1 or package coaching to anyone residing in the region.

So you could hire me to help you attain Self-Mastery or take advantage of my mentoring and coaching systems at a greatly reduced price.

Reach out to me and let’s have a brief chat about your needs.

R